Thursday, 19 February 2015

HUG WILLY CHINESE NEW YEAR OF GOAT


Well it appears, the perverted, balance of terror show has been postponed, at least until Paddy's Day. Sunningdale mark two snakes on, in the guise of a peace process and people will have to wait and tolerate perverted justice for another hundred years or another couple of Dirty Wars wars or so, in the absence of the censored dialectic. Something along the lines of Dirty Marty's remarkable Stormont Disagreement.

‘Pornography Is What the End of the World Looks Like’


By Chris Hedges

February 16, 2015 "ICH" - "Truthdig" - BOSTON—“Fifty Shades of Grey,” the book and the movie, is a celebration of the sadism that dominates nearly every aspect of American culture and lies at the core of pornography and global capitalism. It glorifies our dehumanization of women. It champions a world devoid of compassion, empathy and love. It eroticizes hypermasculine power that carries out the abuse, degradation, humiliation and torture of women whose personalities have been removed, whose only desire is to debase themselves in the service of male lust. The film, like “American Sniper,” unquestioningly accepts a predatory world where the weak and the vulnerable are objects to exploit while the powerful are narcissistic and violent demigods. It blesses this capitalist hell as natural and good.

“Pornography,” Robert Jensen writes, “is what the end of the world looks like.”

We are blinded by self-destructive fantasy. An array of amusements and spectacles, including TV “reality” shows, huge sporting events, social media, porn (which earns at least twice what Hollywood movies generate), alluring luxury products, drugs, alcohol and magic Jesus, offers enticing exit doors from reality. We yearn to be rich, powerful and celebrities. And those we must trample to build our pathetic little empires are seen as deserving their fate. That nearly all of us will never attain these ambitions is emblematic of our collective self-delusion and the effectiveness of a culture awash in manipulation and lies.

Porn seeks to eroticize this sadism. In porn women are paid to repeat the mantra “I am a cunt. I am a bitch. I am a whore. I am a slut. Fuck me hard with your big cock.” They plead to be physically abused. Porn caters to degrading racist stereotypes. Black men are sexually potent beasts stalking white women. Black women have a raw, primitive lust. Latin women are sultry and hotblooded. Asian women are meek, sexually submissive geishas. In porn, human imperfections do not exist. The oversized silicone breasts, the pouting, gel-inflated lips, the bodies sculpted by plastic surgeons, the drug-induced erections that never subside and the shaved pubic regions—which cater to porn’s pedophilia—turn performers into pieces of plastic. Smell, sweat, breath, heartbeats and touch are erased along with tenderness. Women in porn are packaged commodities. They are pleasure dolls and sexual puppets. They are stripped of true emotions. Porn is not about sex, if one defines sex as a mutual act between two partners, but about masturbation, a solitary auto-arousal devoid of intimacy and love. The cult of the self—that is the essence of porn—lies at the core of corporate culture. Porn, like global capitalism, is where human beings are sent to die.

There are few people on the left who grasp the immense danger of allowing pornography to replace intimacy, sex and love. Much of the left believes that pornography is about free speech, as if it is unacceptable to financially exploit and physically abuse a woman in a sweatshop in China but acceptable to do so on the set of a porn film, as if torture is wrong in Abu Ghraib, where prisoners were sexually humiliated and abused as if they were on a porn set, but permissible on commercial porn sites.

A new wave of feminists, who have betrayed the iconic work of radicals such as Andrea Dworkin, defends porn as a form of sexual liberation and self-empowerment. These “feminists,” grounded in Michel Foucault and Judith Butler, are stunted products of neoliberalism and postmodernism. Feminism, for them, is no longer about the liberation of women who are oppressed; it is defined by a handful of women who are successful, powerful and wealthy—or, as in the case of “Fifty Shades of Grey,” able to snag a rich and powerful man. A woman wrote the “Fifty Shades” book, as well as the screenplay. A woman directed the film. A woman studio head bought the movie. This collusion by women is part of the internalization of oppression and sexual violence that have their roots in porn. Dworkin understood. She wrote that “the new pornography is a vast graveyard where the Left has gone to die. The Left cannot have its whores and its politics too.”

I met Gail Dines, one of the most important radicals in the country, in a small cafe in Boston on Tuesday. She is the author of “Pornland: How Porn Has Hijacked Our Sexuality” and a professor of sociology and women’s studies at Wheelock College. Dines, along with a handful of others including Jensen, fearlessly decry a culture that is as depraved as Caligula’s Rome.

“The porn industry has hijacked the sexuality of an entire culture and is laying waste to a whole generation of boys,” she warned. “And when you lay waste to a generation of boys, you lay waste to a generation of girls.”

“When you fight porn you fight global capitalism,” she said. “The venture capitalists, the banks, the credit card companies are all in this feeding chain. This is why you never see anti-porn stories. The media is implicated. It is financially in bed with these companies. Porn is part of this. Porn tells us we have nothing left as human beings—boundaries, integrity, desire, creativity and authenticity. Women are reduced to three orifices and two hands. Porn is woven into the corporate destruction of intimacy and connectedness, and this includes connectedness to the earth. If we were a society where we were whole, connected human beings in real communities, then we would not be able to look at porn. We would not be able to watch another human being tortured.”

“If you are going to give a tiny percent of the world the vast majority of the goodies, you better make sure you have a good ideological system in place that legitimizes why everyone else is suffering economically,” she said. “This is what porn does. Porn tells you that material inequality between women and men is not the result of an economic system. It is biologically based. And women, being whores and bitches and only good for sex, don’t deserve full equality. Porn is the ideological mouthpiece that legitimizes our material system of inequality. Porn is to patriarchy what the media is to capitalism.”

To keep the legions of easily bored male viewers aroused, porn makers produce videos that are increasingly violent and debasing. Extreme Associates, which specializes in graphic rape scenes, along with JM Productions, promotes the very real pain endured by women on its sets. JM Productions pioneered “aggressive throat fucking” or “face fucking” videos such as the “Gag Factor” series, in which women gag and often vomit. It ushered in “swirlies,” in which the male performer dunks the woman’s head into a toilet after sex and then flushes. The company promises, “Every whore gets the swirlies treatment. Fuck her, then flush her.” Repeated and violent anal penetration triggers anal prolapse, a condition in which the inner walls of a woman’s rectum collapse and protrude from her anus. This is called “rosebudding.” Some women, penetrated repeatedly by numerous men on porn shoots, often after taking handfuls of painkillers, require anal and vaginal reconstructive surgery. Female performers may suffer from sexually transmitted diseases and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). And with porn mainstreamed—some porn video participants are treated like film celebrities by talk show hosts such as Oprah and Howard Stern—the behavior promoted by porn, including stripping, promiscuity, S&M and exhibitionism, has become chic. Porn also sets the standard for female beauty and female comportment. And this has had terrifying consequences for girls.

“Women are told in our society they have two choices,” Dines said. “They are either fuckable or invisible. To be fuckable means to conform to the porn culture, to look hot, be submissive and do what the man wants. That’s the only way you get visibility. You cannot ask adolescent girls, who are dying for visibility, to choose invisibility.”

None of this, Dines pointed out, was by accident. Porn grew out of the commodity culture, the need by corporate capitalists to sell products.

“In post-Second-World-War America you have the emergence of a middle class with a disposable income,” she said. “The only trouble is that this group was born to parents who had been through a depression and a war. They did not know how to spend. They only knew how to save. What [the capitalists] needed to jump-start the economy was to get people to spend money on stuff they did not need. For women they brought in the television soaps. One of the reasons the ranch house was developed was because [families] only had one television. The television was in the living room and women spent a lot of time in the kitchen. You had to devise a house where she could watch television from the kitchen. She was being taught.”

“But who was teaching the men how to spend money?” she went on. “It was Playboy [Magazine]. This was the brilliance of Hugh Hefner. He understood that you don’t just commodify sexuality, you sexualize commodities. The promise that Playboy held out was not the girls or the women, it was that if you buy at this level, if you consume at the level Playboy tells you to, then you will get the prize, which is the women. The step that was crucial to getting the prize was the consumption of commodities. He wrapped porn, which sexualized and commoditized women’s bodies, in an upper-middle-class blanket. He gave it a veneer of respectability.”

The VCR, the DVD and, later, the Internet allowed porn to be pumped into individual homes. The glossy, still images of Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler became tame, even quaint. America, and much of the rest of the world, became pornified. The income of the global porn industry is estimated at $96 billion, with the United States market worth about $13 billion. There are, Dines writes, “420 million Internet porn pages, 4.2 million porn Web sites, and 68 million search engine requests for porn Dines daily.


Along with the rise of pornography there has been an explosion in sex-related violence, including domestic abuse, rape and gang rape. A rape is reported every 6.2 minutes in the United States, but the estimated total, taking into account unreported assaults, is perhaps five times higher, as Rebecca Solnit points out in her book “Men Explain Things to Me.”

“So many men murder their partners and former partners that we have well over a thousand homicides of that kind a year—meaning that every three years the death toll tops 9/11’s casualties, though no one declares a war on this particular kind of terror,” Solnit writes.

Porn, meanwhile, is ever more accessible.

“With a mobile phone you can deliver porn to men who live in highly concentrated neighborhoods in Brazil and India,” Dines said. “If you have one laptop in the family, the man can’t sit in the middle of the room and jerk off to it. With a phone, porn becomes portable. The average kid gets his porn through the mobile phone.”

The old porn industry, which found its profits in movies, is dead. The points of production no longer generate profits. The distributors of porn make the money. And one distributor, MindGeek, a global IT company, dominates porn distribution. Free porn is used on the Internet as bait by MindGeek to lure viewers to pay-per-view porn sites. Most users are adolescent boys. It is, Dines said, “like handing out cigarettes outside of a middle school. You get them addicted.”

“Around the ages of 12 to 15 you are developing your sexual template,” she said. “You get [the boys] when they are beginning to construct their sexual identity. You get them for life. If you begin by jerking off to cruel, hardcore, violent porn then you are not going to want intimacy and connection. Studies are showing that boys are losing interest in sex with real women. They can’t sustain erections with real women. In porn there is no making love. It is about making hate. He despises her. He is revolted and disgusted by her. If you bleed out the love you have to fill it with something to make it interesting. They fill it with violence, degradation, cruelty and hate. And that also gets boring. So you have to keep ratcheting it up. Men get off in porn from women being submissive. Who is more submissive than children? The inevitable route of all porn is child porn. And this is why organizations that fight child porn and do not fight adult porn are making a huge mistake.”

The abuse inherent in pornography goes unquestioned in large part by both men and women. Look at the movie ticket sales for “Fifty Shades of Grey,” which opened the day before Valentine’s Day and is expected to take in up to $90 million over the four-day weekend (which includes Presidents Day on Monday).

“Pornography has socialized a generation of men into watching sexual torture,” Dines said. “You are not born with that capacity. You have to be trained into it. Just like you train soldiers to kill. If you are going to carry out violence against a group you have to dehumanize them. It is an old method. Jews become kikes. Blacks become niggers. Women become cunts. And no one turns women into cunts better than porn.”

Wednesday, 18 February 2015

WILLIE FRAZER IS PROOF OF A PSEUDO PEACE PROCESS



























Some of you's bhoys and ghirls are bould fenians, I'm not saying that you's are unrepentant bastards or anything like that, to insult ye, but you's are heartless. The Plantation of Ulster (Irish-Plandáil Uladh) the organized ethnic cleansing of the province and subsequent colonisation (plantation) by Britain in 1609 was not Willie Frazer's fault. It was an extension of Britain's first colony. Willie's father and Uncle paid the price of being in the British Army of Occupation in Ireland, and I am sure Willie is worried about the same happening to himself, as most people in occupied Ireland are today. Willie is simply following the Orange Order ideology, passed on to him by his father and you can't fault someone that stands by their belief or tradition, and stands their ground. No more than most of us, he is mostly a victim of circumstance and false, secret, ideology passed on to him by the Orange Order, on the basis of a forged letter by William Of Orange, who cam over from Holland and usurped the British throne.

I personally can empathize with Willie, because it's not my fault that I had a Blueshirt father, who waited until his deathbed, to admit he was wrong and my mothers republicanism was correct. That doesn't mean that everything my father taught me was wrong. One of the basic things he taught me was, that two wrongs do not make a right, and I believe this applies in the instance of Willie's visit to Dublin. Of course people can rightfully say, that Britain's Dirty War, with varying degrees of intensity, is still going on in Ireland, and that Willie as a member of the British territorial Army, is a fair target but I do not agree. He has stated the purpose of his march, is to highlight the secrecy, still surrounding the killing of members of his community. He and his fellow Orangemen, intend to march in full view, unarmed down O'Connell Street to Leinster House and lodge an official petition. Like the Dublin/Monaghan bombings, that slaughtered so many Dubliners, the execution of which, included some of Willie's neighbours, the truth still has not seen the light of day and everyone's families, including Willie's community, after so many years, are entitled to the truth, to put the past to rest and move on with their lives.

Perhaps I am an ignorant man but the only successful Peace Process, that has happened in my lifetime, is the one in South Africa, which was based on Truth and Reconciliation. Clearly this has not happened in Ireland. Archbishop Tutu oversaw a public, transparent, platform, which daily witnessed both perpetrators and victims, give clear accounts, of war crimes, that happened in the Apartheid era. There was so much public, grief, anger and tragedy on both sides in public view, that people from both black and white communities, could only empathize with the horror inficted on both sides and as a result cross the racial divide. That empathy, crossed the racial divide sufficently, that South Africa, despite it's linerging economic issues, succeeded in laying the foundation for a solution.This will never happen in Occupied Ireland for many reasons, unless Britain leaves. British civil service bureaucracy, which was inherited by all its Commonwealth states or former colonies, was also inherited in Ireland. It includes such instruments as the Official Secrets Act, thirty year secret provisions with redaction, that transparecy is impossible. So in the case of Willie's community and in the case of the Dublin/Monaghan victims, they will never learn the truth of the Dirty War or the collaboration as long as Britain controls Irish affairs. The Irish establishment also have a vested interest in maintaining the status quo, which leads to decades of more misery, especially the most vulnerable. We have a fake Peace Process, that made some progress but mostly at a superficial level. The Dirty War still goes on, mostly at low intensity, and will inevitably flare again, sparked by issues like POW torture, social injustice or heaven forbid another Hunger Strike.

Now it is far easier for me write this in my detached state, than for people confronted by this everyday thorn in their lives. It is also easier because I have been fortunate enough, to deal with my past resentments, which would be more correctly called hatred. I do not resent any British person today and I hope with the help of the stardust, it never happens again, because it simply tortured me and drove me out of my mind. So I hope I am not writing out of hate but simply love of my country and people, with all its different traditions, that includes Orangemen, although I must admit I do enjoy poking fun at them, along with the Xpensive Quill. However, this is a serious matter and perhaps, Willie carries similar resentments today, which if we reflect on it, is quite understandable.

My humble suggestion is that all the victims families in th south, peacefully join Willie in his "Love Ulster" march. Indeed I would respectfully suggest, everyone, peacefully join the "Love Ulster" march, with a word of Irish honour, that they will remain peaceful but that is perhaps not realisitic under present circumstance. People are entitled to their opinions and the right to peaceully express them, including Willie. I believe, if the Blueshirt Minster for Justice in Leinster House, has any heart and balls, should personally receive Willie's petition and genuinely give Willie a big hug but being a politcian, I doubt he has the sincerity to do this, without it being choreographed. But for the love of Buddah, someone who has processed their grief and resentment of the past, GIVE WILLIE A HUG! I also believe, that everyone who protests Willie's march, might consider starting a genune Peace Process, based on a Truth & Reconciliation platform, covered properly by the media, overseen by Archbishop Tutu. I believe all political prisoners, should be released, as was the case under the previous agreement and and did not re-offend. I believe Britain needs to give a clear and unequivocal declaration of withdrawal. I believe that the EU, has a responsibilty. along with the IMF, to make up the shortfall, in the annual 10 billion pound sterling, British taxpayer subsidy to the north, until the impoverished people of empire, are empowered to stand on their own two feet and be self-supporting. Now of course, none of this will happen, unless people get up off their arse and make it happen and that depends on how much you Love your Country and your children. GO ON! GIVE WILLIE A HUG!, NOT A BONE CRUSHER!







Mine’s a wee bush and Mi Wadi


by Perkin Warbeck
Even as he sashays down Sackville Street back again/ as ais aris at the head of his loyal followers in sashes and bowler hats and dashing old blades with fasces as long as Lurgan spades.

What a spectacle that will be: as the snaking regarders from Hollywood, County Wicklow with their furled copies of The Unionist Times under their oxters conjoin once more in the main drag of the Orange Free Stateen with their good buddies from Hollywood, County Down and their furled brollies (small b, go deo, Smoking Joe) in their simply red hands.

The choice of tunes will be an embarras de riches. Pardon one’s Kermit but as the House of Frazer originated in the landing strips of Normandy it does seem somehow not inappropriate.

‘Je suis Prest’ being also the motto on the family coat of arms.

Which is mischievously spelled betimes with an added letter ‘Je suis Priest’ and other times with a missing letter ‘Je suis Pest’. The Frazer who styles himself ‘Je suis Willie’ will remain stoically unimpressed and know better than to pay any attention to these sidewalk scoffers with ABC on their shins. As it says on the tin: ‘I am Ready’. (Derived, according to Phil the Philologist, from the Buckinhamshire term: ‘We are Readies’).

Surprisingly, strawberries rather than oranges feature in the family armorial crest, being a pun upon the Kermit word ‘fraisse’ for the fruit not an orange. The similarity and hilarity of cette parole with the family name was just too much pun for the fun-loving Frazers to ignore.

But, mais revenons a nos moutons: let us return to our song of songs.

In a wonderfully in-depth lookback at the first score years of ‘Ireland’s Recall’ in last Saturnine’s Unionist Times the outlook was anything but gloomy for the future of this national tantrum of the eggchasing game.

Rather did the author stand shoulder to shoulder with o for ovoid and optimism. Reminding his readers that when the Coulter chorus first got a Captain’s run out and rang out around the HQ of the Alickadoos a try was worth a mere three points. Look at it now: a full fiver. ‘I am Ready’, one might say,having small changed into ‘We are Readies’ as the game has morphed from the shamateur to the street walking pro.

No more will those who have loyally stood up for the Ulsterman in the wee, glorious past have to stand up for Connie. The second last or penultimate line in the leprechaun version of The Soldiers’ Song / Amhran na bhFiann being,of course/ ar ndoigh: ‘Shoving Connie around the Green’.

No more will Oor Woolie or Wee Sommy himself have to humiliate himself on his trips south of the Boyne Water by first having to shove Connie around Stephen’s Green in order to cheer on the Boyz in Green in the Aviva.

-Stuff ‘em, say SUFTUM.

It will be bye, bye, Miss United Oirland Pie in the Sky / BT even as the Prez’s Chevie get driven to the levie to find the levie dry and good ole boys wryly drinking up the headlines about the water charges and other divarsions.

It will be be bye, bye Peggy Sue agus Pegeen Mike and hello Mary LU.

No, not Mary Lou, Mary LU: as in Love Ulster.

Tiocfaidh ar LA / Our Lethal Allies will come !

All the way from the Glennane Peace Centre. Which as any Fianna Failler with an eye to regaining power will tell you, come averil,come April showers, when she’s not tellling you about ‘Sinn Fein/ IRA’ is Glen Fhionnain in the original leprechaun: The Valley of Fionnan and not, repeat not, the Valley of the Seventeenth Dail

Phew. Mine’s a wee bush and Mi Wadi.



Tuesday, 17 February 2015

DUBLIN LOVES WILLY




While everyone know that Willy is a thoroughbred Orangeman on his father side, the bloolline on his mortherside is a closely guarded secret. Away back, apprentlyher people, came to Markethill and Jonesboro to sell China from China. This is why Willy wears glasses, even though he has perfectly good eyesight. Now being a lover of Ornage culture he is also very fond of his Chinese culture and this is another reason, he bringing his goats to Dublin, for the Chinese New Year, which starts on the 19th of February. Normally, Willy breaks up his Irish winter, with a holiday on an Island, in the South China Sea, where the local langauge is a combination of Chinese, English and Malay, which is known as Chinglish. Well below are a couple transcripts of conversations he had on his last trip, which were taped. As you will see Will speaks eloquent Chinglish.

Kuniklo: a you! a you!
Kuniklo: I'll breathe in your face you laowai
Kuniklo: don't a you carr me pigga!
Kuniklo: why, I'rr smoke all over you, and a frow my teef at you when they is fell ou
Willy : haha don't maka me getta mise ofer hand ouot ofa mise nose
Kuniklo: yers! I'rr frow my nose gold atta you!
Kunikl: I digging right a now!
Kuniklo: oh. Me not find gold yet. Let a me keep trying
Willy: eurekka, i gotta me some bigga nuggets here in mise hand for yous
Kuniklo: hmm, this is a nice. I like a peeking my nose
Kuniklo: I is forget everything. I just a want pick nose now.
Kuniklo: is really? you geeva me gold?
Kuniklo: I can't a peek down any, er gold
Willy: hows bout i make a freends wiv you and we bee gooda freends, i pimp my goets, letta yous ride my goet five dolla
Kuniklo: eevu you geev me you gold, we can be gouda friends!
Kuniklo: I know you two minutes! yers, we is olda friends
Kuniklo: sures!
Kuniklo: I like a make friends
Kuniklo: I like to speet people, then they say, "deed a you speet on me?!"
Kuniklo: ranhou I says, "yers! you sound a like my hometown people!"
Kuniklo: "let's be friends!"
Willy: in chinese is not same, meet you for 1 day I give yous mise nuggets and me wife-a, an goet, then we good very freendss
Kuniklo: I make a friends. I speet on a peoples.
Kuniklo: I like a rubbish
Willy: throwing rubbishes is a china tradition
Kuniklo: I like a too buy things. then I take a things wrappers, and stand in the rubbish
Kuniklo: it's a nice
Kuniklo: it's a chocolate cake
Kuniklo: I like a too throw the chocolate cake, too!
Kuniklo: then I a step in eet
Kuniklo: yers, throw the garbages is tradition, ten thousand years old
Willy: yeser, then its a notta my problema, mei ban fa
Kuniklo: yers, meibanfa
Kuniklo: kongzi, she said, "the rubbish is gouda for hearf."
Kuniklo: ancient Chinese secret
Kuniklo: he say, rubbish is gouda for the welt
Willy: yers, itta makes earf so stronga like goets
Kuniklo: yers. and more dirt, less eelness
Kuniklo: no dirty person havu eelness. see?
Willy: chinese sentence, "put rubbish on the ground makes earf so gouda"
Kuniklo: it is tradition of China of ten thousand years of kongzi.
Willy: yers in people of republic of the china
Kuniklo: yers we ve
Kuniklo: trash is many, the eel is notta many. trash bump, strong floor.
Kuniklo: see? I translate gouda
Kuniklo: you say "nihao"? Wa! you is genius like a Einstein! You Chinese is wheel
Willy: yous a gouda, maybe i teacha you chinesa and you tell me propa engerlisha
Kuniklo: yers that is a fair
Kuniklo: you give me everything worth money, I give you free things. I pay you nothing. Is very good
Kuniklo: see? all is fairly
Willy: all is gouda in engelisha, is world speaking engelisha, i want talk to foreign freends
Kuniklo: you seVilly, you a chingalisha is wheel. is becurse you havu Irish wife. He Chinese is wheel, so you Chinese too is wheel
Kunikloyou see? we all is speaking the chingalisha, we understandingly
Willy:  you china is very wheel, i very like ulsta engelisha, is better speaking than china
Kuniklo: yes I speak a "nihao" so my Chinese is wheel
Kuniklo: Next a time we need to add a Weelyam
Kuniklo: heez a chingalish is goodly!
Kuniklo: is velly chocolate cake! nice!
Willy: today i was told my china is very good, "you say guangdong hua very wheel, no, i can't speak cantonese, no butta you is guangdonghua very wheel" 
Kuniklo: yes. Justa now, havu chinese wooman with goets
Kuniklo: she say a too me, "you nanjing hua is velly wheel."
Kuniklo: but I no talk nanjinghua
Willy: yes, i best like floot
Kuniklo: then I no talk nanjing hua, I just a talk a chinese. keshi she say, you nanjing talk is wheel
Kuniklo: floot? floot is deeeeeeeeeelishuuuurrrs
Kuniklo: mmmm flooot!
Willy: nanjinghua is bloppoodonghuafnar, is this word gouda, i find in my electric book
Kuniklo: I'm a liking the apple! the watermelons! the grapes! do a yoo like floot?
Kuniklo: a yoo know? floot is nice
Willy: yers my best like floot is orange but I like grape too
Kuniklo: floot is nicelyness
Kuniklo: yers the grape is gouda
Willy: yes my family eats floot, orange is happiness
Kuniklo: butta me more like the orange too
Kuniklo: the orange is nice becurse it roundly
Willy: china is the floot of banana because we is monkey
Kuniklo: the grape is. Wheel. I no mean that. I mean, the round is the orange, the grape is no round
Kuniklo: the grape EEZ round, butta me no say. Da zenme shuo?
Kuniklo: oh yes. Beega
Kuniklo: the orange is BEEEEEGA. More bigly than grape
Kuniklo: my orange make grape flatly, becurse it is a beega
Willy: \the grape is smallness then you
Kuniklo: what you say? the grape is smallness. I knows
Kuniklo: but I is no foodWilly
Willy: Why you knowwatermelon is more beeger, it makes my orange flatly
Kuniklo: the watermelon is bigness than the grape a or the orange
Kuniklo: ha. we is speaking togetherly
Kuniklo: we eez old a friends. we share gold, cake. It is cakeness
Willy: we is gouda freends now, we can speaka the foreign freends now an pimp ma goets
Kuniklo: we go to French
Willy: they speaka goouda gouda engelisha too,we can pimp goed dere
Willy: but indooia speeka the zui goudest engelisha
Kuniklo: lol
Kuniklo: I go to the French, they wheel speak Egrish, zui niceand pimp yo goets
Kuniklo: they wheel be nice to us, we have prety goets anbecurse we speet, we frow the rubbishes, we speaka gouda Engrish
Kuniklo: they wheel lovu us so bigly
Willy:i lika the paris very most, it is a gouda country for goets too.
Kuniklo: so lomantika
Kuniklo: the palee is the zui lomanteeka. I'm love it
Kuniklo: I want a too go becurse my booka tay-os me, guowai havu Palee
Kuniklo: and whole world havu two country: Chinese and Guowai
Willy: so i'm wanting learn proppa engelisha to go foreign country, i want tobring ma goets to Dublin next yeer
Kuniklo: and the capital of the Guowai is Palee, velly lomantik
Kuniklo: is really?! I want to Palee too
Kuniklo: do you eat the ap-owe?
Kuniklo: I lika peep-owe and app-owe
Kuniklo: liku there be many peepoe in the French
Willy: i'm liking mowe and mowe the fooding
Kuniklo: and they is eat the appowe
Kuniklo: mowe fooding is nice. I like to eat the deeleeshurs foods
Kuniklo: and I'm like sleeping!
Kuniklo: sleeping is my hobby. I'm university stewdant in sleeping. I learn the sleeping for study
Willy: mm is nice, likaa chocorlate caker wit ma orange
Kuniklo: mmm yers
Kuniklo: my go sleeping no
Willy: my too with ma goets
Kuniklo: the dream is the chocolate cake!
Kuniklo: byeah byeah
Willy: yers, have gouoda dreamers
Kuniklo: bya bya le
Willy: bye bye leal the best

Transcript 2 Morning


Willy: chocolate cake is a nice!
Kuniklo: yes-a
Willy: i-a eat-a chocolate bread an ornages for breakfirst!
Willy: its a tasty-a!
Kuniklo: yes-a, ita is a delishirs
Will: and also for a dinger
Will: you buy me dingi-a thirsty-a!
Kuniklo: then I listen to the musics
Kuniklo: let's go ba
Willy: i-a eat-a neige food-a
Kuniklo: let's a go have a delishirs dinger
Willy: at a deeleeshurs lestolung
Kuniklo: we is a hungry. you kooka fooda?
Willy orange my-a favoleeta fooda - lais-a!
Kuniklo : mmm zheige lestolung is deeleeshurs
Willy: eez-a laisasorry.
Willy: mmmmmmm
Kuniklo: flied lice. i very favorite it
Willy: i-a speaka neige mandalinga too
Kuniklo: are you liking the flied liceI really am a liking it
Willy: my-a keed-a eez-a eeng-a King Der Gatten
Kuniklo: ohdid you having a baby?
Willy: yes-a
Willy: im love my goet
Kuniklo: i am having a daughter. He is-a fiva years old.
Willy: i doung want go to my company on marning. want stay in my home stay play with goet
Kuniklo: i just is a sleeping.
Kuniklo: I'm don't a want go to office.
Kuniklo: I'm like play with my baby
Willy: i eat my lunch wit ma goet
Willy: i left my wife at 5 oclock
Willy: [did u get a new job the next day?]
Kuniklo: you have a two heads
Kuniklo: LOL
Willy: no, i agan go wife tomorrow
Willy: another one
Willhow many heads do i have?
Willy: ??? hairsmany!
Kuniklo: two a!
Willy: wo hairs?
Kuniklo: i know. I is knowing the answers.
Kuniklo: you a have two hez.
Willy:  knowdeng yi xiazhi daoneige..... xed-a!
Kuniklo: do you get married?
Kuniklo: are you mary?
Willy:  i am a amry goet and wife
Kuniklo: nice a too meet a you, leelee.
Kuniklo: My a name is a TomHanks.
Willy: my name is Ian!
Kuniklo: [teacher: "You mean your name is Tom?"]
Willy: but ian is a mans name!
Kuniklo: no, my name is TomHanks!
Kuniklo: one word a.
Willy: haha
Willy: Li Li is a two worda!
Kuniklo: zhidao ma. LeeLee es two. But a Leelee is one.
Willy: haha
Willy: zhidao le
Kuniklo: you know teacher Will. You are fat.
Kuniklo: You are a too fat.
Will:y you-a musta speaka eenglisha!
Willy: haha
Willy: they love saying that stuff
Kuniklo: you-a speaka Engaleesh a very well!
Kuniklo: they do
Willy:  youa eeza a neige mei guo, solly, beautiful-country-person, shi ba?
Kuniklo: You musta speak a ChineseI want to say, noEngleesha
Willy: how you a speaka propa englisha this word?
Willy: you say chinese?
Kuniklo: oh you a chinese is very well
Kuniklo: you say "ni haoso well.
Willy: yeah, all 3 words of it!
Kuniklo: you is zhongguo tong
Kuniklo: you know dashan ma?
Willy: yeshe - my brother in law!
Willy: my's bratherin law
Willy: really?
Kuniklo: dashan is a very great a man. he from Australia.
Will: zhen de ma?
Kuniklo: he havu two cheeldren
Will: oh, youa eeza makea jokea!
Willy: no, one children!
Kuniklo: my's brazer
Willy: is a many years olda
Kuniklo: eggskillme, do you know how get US visaI is wanting to go there
Willy: haha
Kuniklo: I applied, but a I havu some a problems. Do you know what a papers I need?
Will: LOL
Willy: LOL
Willy: LOL
Willy: my'sa  sister is a live in wyomingyou know her?
Kuniklo: you know I ask the company how to apply, and a they say the visa needs much of paper works. Can you help a meI knows you help. Then I take you dinner
Will: dinger
Kuniklo: Yes-a. You a sister havu four legs, duimashe has a many spots and a says "moo"
Willy: in a delishurs lestolang
Kuniklo: right there in Wyomeen. I seen her.
Willy: yers!
Kuniklo: eggskillme teacher william. Do you having too much to eatI think you is very fat. You are needing to lose weight.
Kuniklo: But I take you to nice lestolang
Kuniklo: we will eat your sister, he says moo
Willy: U is need lose a your weight.
Kuniklo: no, I is too thinny.
Kunikl: I'm thinly now. al the stewdants tiel me
Kuniklo: "teacher Tao, you is too thinlyyou shourd eat a more fooda!"
Willy: harhar
Kuniklo: "teacher Tao, you is having a long. long. how to say?"
Willy: i like eata breakfirst!
Willy: i eat orange, bread and milk
Kuniklo: "if you not have that, you look very youngly."
Kuniklo: "do you a eata breakfirst?"
Kuniklo: nah, I skip it every day.
Kuniklo: "Oh, but a teacher tao, you must a have breakfirst."
Kuniklo: I eat bread and milk. I like footaball.
Willy: and a volleball and a badamingtona
Kuniklo: I like a footaball game.
Kuniklo: a reallyis it really?
Willy: I's frenda playa thisa gama
Kuniklo: me too like badamingtona
Kuniklo: I play good, you see
Kuniklo: I like a footaball, but my wife not let me watch TV
Willy: you with me me play?
Kuniklo: sureI'm happily!
Willy: my's give give me to do much thing!
Willy: go park
Kuniklo: go park eat bread and milk
Willy: go into park wit goets
Kuniklo: it is goodly, I think.
Willy: yers!
Kuniklo: do you having lunch today?
Kunikloa: is that a all you have for lunch?
Kuniklo: eat a morely
Willy: im have lunch already!
Kuniklo: lol
Willy: beforebefore wung hour
Willy: two nour
Kuniklo: yers
Kuniklo: you is full, is it not?
Willy: yes, is eat a full
Kuniklo: I don't a like your clothes, teacher William
Willy: but it is a new!
Kuniklo: i'm think you need a soota
Willy: i a buy on market
Willy: but eeza a expensiva!
Kuniklo: you before look much more youngly
Willy: now i look a big!
Kuniklo: yers
Willy: more big than is a before
Kuniklo: you should have a diet
Kuniklo: i have many advice for you
Willy: o!!!! u want me a die?
Willy: i died?
Willy: u not nice like crossmaglen  
Kuniklo: yers
Willy: u is bad men!
Kuniklo: what a not niceyou have diet, you thin, you sexy
Kuniklo: you wife love you
Kuniklo: me not know you marry
Willy: i is a marry goet too
Willy: was been marry goets before two year, you not ride ma goets, I goanother countree to dublin, make monee!