MOTHER IRELAND AS SICK AS OUR SECRETS

The quote with the picture above by Dali, is from  one of Ireland's most notable writers, James Joyce, whose works until recently, we censored in Ireland. His partner was a woman, who was born, in a village near my birthplace in Galway. He was also like myself partial to all sorts of whores, which is also the much argued theme of my favourite song Raglan Road, above. Some people say I'm still a bit of a whore myself and there might be some truth in it, but I wouldn't be listening to everything they say, for you're own peace of mind, if I were you.

James Joyce was so disgusted by the the two scum states of Ireland in exile, that despite dire circumstances abroad, leading up to his death, he refused to accept what passes to be an Irish passport. Like James Joyce, I have a love-hate relationship with Ireland, primarily because of its dark dirty secrets and hypocrisy, unlike James I am not much of writer, as most of ye can observe but then I am writing first for myself, so see if I'm bothered what ye think.

Below is an aggregate, of the only solution that I have found, with regard to a matter, that has seriously concerned and enraged me, since I was a young boy, growing up in the west of Ireland and which is currently topical, with even more revelations, regarding the ongoing abuse of children in Ireland, by professed Irish republicans, with an alleged dozen more revealed yesterday. 

As I have learned in recovery, DENIAL is not a river in Egypt, and despite considerable recent media coverage of child abuse n Ireland, based on my considerable interactions there, the vast majority of Irish people are still in considerable denial about its reality and are still passively enabling it. With the help of the Big Spirit that I do not understand, who has taken good care of me, through the 12 Phukt Steps, whom I have come to trust, I hope the day never comes, where I would turn my back on my own people or sell out our age old dream of liberation.


I came across much of this material, while grappling with the 12 Phukt Steps, which are above in the right hand corner of this page. I used to think my lying was only about drinking. However, whenever I lied about how many drinks I had, it was because I had far more and I knew it. So, my lying was a symptom of my sickness. As I acquired more sober time, more and more has been revealed to me, with the help of many other people, some of them being mirrors of myself. 

The saying, "we are as sick as our secrets,"applies to all parts of my life or to anything I am lying about today and I confess to be no born again virgin yet, nor do I aspire to be one. As I said, some whores are alright. I have learned that, when I start to stray off the road less traveled or lie about something, of the smallest detail, I try to stop right there and check my motivations and internal agenda, by taking a good, gentle look at what is really driving my fear of the truth of being revealed for who I really am.

I have learned that even a bit of blarney, to save someone else’s feelings are really not about saving them from hurt feelings, but trying to save myself by lying. For example, if my wife who just loves her new tee shirt of a female finger sucker and asks my opinion, while I think it's ugly, my first impulse to to lie, comes from fear of confrontation or the discomfort that comes, when I tell people something, she or they they do not want to hear. Jack Nicholson expresses it perfectly in " A Few Good Men," when he says, "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH". 

This seems to be precisely, what appears to be happening in Ireland currently, with regard to child abuse and child rape. I do try(occasionally) to be gently honest, without hurting their feelings  or being hypercritical but sometimes it's just too phuckin frustrating, beating round the bush, so I have developed a lot of dirty talk, which comes in quite handy sometimes and feels quite liberating. However I have lost a lot of so called friends in the process but I have found a few quality ones instead. So it seems to boil down to a question of quality or quantity.

From experience, the consequences of lying, are far worse than the feared result to begin with. Telling fibs or blatant lies or withholding truth are all self destructive habits, I developed in my dysfunctional home and country of crazy behaviour, that denied both myself and other Irish people around me, dignity and respect. Most Dutch people people I knew, when living in the Netherlands for instance, would much rather hear a difficult truth than be lied to, even if a lot of them are cheese heads.

I differentiate my real friends from acquaintances, as the people who always get the whole story; whom I can tell anything, and vice-versa. If I ask them for the truth, I expect it, otherwise they are messing with my head, heart and spirit. It naturally  follows, if I expect the truth from them, who am I, to ever withhold the truth from them. Intimacy from my own experience, is only possible when we tell each other the truth, everything withheld creates distance and barriers. 

Likewise some of my biggest lies are lies of omission because context is really important. Without the truth, I was sometimes very lonely and had many conflicting feelings along with being very confused, that is mostly not the case anymore. I have learned, that there is always, some underlying fear of consequence, which I don’t want to face, with fear being the real culprit. My truth needs to be brought out into the bright light of Spirit, otherwise I am as sick as my secrets and I am infecting my immediate family and larger Irish family and in my case it is large indeed.

I learned with the above, to forgive, as I have been mostly forgiven, fortunately. In fact I have a confession to make. The primary reason, I celebrated when Maggie Thatcher died, was that it removed my last remaining resentment and my impulse to strangle the bitch. I had forgiven everyone from my past but Maggie was the big exception. I spent a lot of my time taking her inventory.

She had ordered the execution in cold blood of my country women and men. She was the principal cause of the death of 10 Irish hunger strikers. She contracted her father's disease of being a pedophile. She had two children and hated her husband Denis. Being the pervert that she was, she sought intimacy elsewhere, and brought the paedophile Jimmy Savile over for diversion at Christmas, while they both kiddie fiddled. 

She had the audacity to tell her ministers, that all the Irish are liars. However recently observing the child rape debate in Ireland or more correctly non-debate, I horrifically have come to the conclusion, that perhaps there was more than a little grain of truth to what Maggie the bitch said. Forgive me please, I'm human and still trying to heal after 27 years of it, but it has been a wonderful trip, thanks to all you sick phuks for healing me, 12 phukin steps at a time!

JUST SPIES LIES NO CHARGE, TRIAL, JUSTICE OR PEACE PROCESS FOR MARTIN COREY

Annie Machon MI5

 A Peace Process Without Due Process is Oxymoronic. With regard to British Occupied Ireland a former MI5 British Secret Service agent has explained it best, in an article she wrote in the Huffington Post. It is a long article so I will quote the parts relevant to the failing Peace Process in Ireland.

Gestapo Courts

The concept of secret courts emerged from the official UK spook sector - MI5 and MI6 have been lobbying hard for such protection over recent years. Their argument revolves around a number of civil cases, where British victims of extraordinary rendition and subsequent torture have sued the pants off the spies through civil courts and received some recompense for their years of suffering.


The spies' argument is that having to produce evidence in their own defence would damage that ever-flexible but curiously vague concept of "national security".

Well, they would say that, wouldn't they?

The spooks have traditionally used the "national security" argument as the ultimate get-out-of-jail-free card. It has never been legally defined, but it is unfailingly effective with judges and politicians.

Suspects are scooped up and interned in high security British prisons on the say-so of faceless intelligence officers. No evidence needed to be adduced, nor can it be challenged. The subsequent control order system is equally Kafkaesque.

That's not to say that certain interned individuals might not have been an active threat to the UK. However, in the "good" old days suspects would have had evidence gathered against them, been tried by a jury, convicted and imprisoned. The system was never perfect and evidence could be egregiously withheld, but at least appeals were possible, most notably in the case of the Birmingham Six.

All these historic common law principles seem to have been jettisoned with the enshrinement of "secret courts" they are already being used in the UK - the Special Immigration Appeal Commission (SIAC) tribunals hear secret evidence and the defendant's chosen lawyer is not allowed to attend. Instead a special, government-approved advocate is appointed to "represent the interests" of the defendant who is not allowed to know what his accusers have to say. And there was no appeal.

But all this is so unnecessary. The powers are already in place to be used (and abused) to shroud our notionally open court process in secrecy. Judges can exclude the press and the public from court rooms by declaring the session in camera for all or part of the proceedings. Plus, in national security cases, government ministers can also issue Public Interest Immunity Certificates (PIIs) that not only bar the press from reporting the proceedings, but can also ban them from reporting they are gagged - the governmental super-injunction.

So the powers already exist to protect "national security". No, the real point of the new secret courts is to ensure that the defendant and, particularly in my view, their chosen lawyers cannot hear the allegations if based on intelligence of any kind. Yet even the spies themselves agree that the only type of intelligence that really needs to be kept secret involves ongoing operations, agent names, and sensitive operational techniques.

And as for the right to be tried by a jury of your peers - forget it. Of course juries will have no place in such secret courts. The only time we have seen such draconian judicial measures in the UK outside a time of official war was during the Troubles in Northern Ireland - the infamous Diplock Courts - beginning in the 1970s and which incredibly were still in use this year.

As a former MI5 intelligence officer, I am not an apologist of terrorism although I can understand the social injustice that can lead to it. However, I'm also very aware that the threat can be artificially ramped up and manipulated to achieve preconceived political goals.

I would suggest that the concept of secret courts will prove fatally dangerous to our democracy. It may start with the concept of getting the Big Bad Terrorist, but in more politically unstable or stringent economic times this concept is wide open to mission creep.

We are already seeing a slide towards expanding the definition of "terrorist" to include "domestic extremists", activists, single issue campaigners et al, as I have written before. And just recently information was leaked about a new public-private EU initiative, Clean IT, that proposes ever more invasive and draconian policing powers to hunt down "terrorists" on the internet. This proposal fails to define terrorism, but does provide for endemic electronic surveillance of the EU. Pure corporatism.

Allowing secret courts to try people on the say-so of a shadowy, unaccountable and burgeoning spy community lands us straight back in the pages of history: La Terreur of revolutionary France, the creepy surveillance of the Stasi, or the disappearances and torture of the Gestapo.

Have we learned nothing?

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