Thursday, 21 November 2013


As the BBC's dirty Old Man, Doctor Who, turns 50 this year, according to a BBC Dr Who rehabilitation report , the Shoreditch Electric Light Station Workshop’s is getting the BBC spin treatment again to re-invent a new non paedo BBC image, In today's BBC they are waxing lyrical about an 1963 member of the group, Delia Derbyshire, transformed songwriter Ron Grainer’s straightforward theme tune into a cosmic fantasia of burbles and alien winds. Grainer famously asked her “Did I write that?” “Most of it,” she replied apparently.

Fans of the bizarre Paedo Dr Who cult, and those children unlucky enough to have been groomed for Jimmy Saville's Beeb friends watching it, will be aware that certain elements are constant between the different Doctors right through the Jimmy Saville and friends era. There is of course the perennial assistant, usually a bubbly but vacant teenage girl with permanently erect nipples and a thin T-shirt. This Paedo Dr Who tradition is set to continue, and the search is on for the next assistant.

The BBC hype today that the Doctor Who theme became possibly the most important electronic music ever made and the most widely-heard avant-garde recording in history, triggering the modern era in popular music just as much as The Beatles did.They fail to mention that the Paedo BBC were due to replace Doctor Christopher Ecclestone with an older sibling, the F1 pygmy Bernie Ecclestone and are understood to have embraced an alternative enthusiastically, after unexplained accidents befell several family members of the BBC's Board of Governors.

“Back then it must have been the most incredible thing you could possibly imagine,” says Steven Moffat ignoring the paedo arrogance, which has been a feature of the Paedo Dr Who trait exhibited by most incarnations of the Doctor since the series began. A Quirky wardrobe only matched by Chelsea's Mourinho's dogged insistence, that he wear a distinctive ragged mohair overcoat on the touchline at Chelsea but Auntie's tradition will continue although it will be dry cleaned after the exposure in the law courts, of systemic BBC paedophillia, to rid it of the Jimmy Saville odour on the old tramp's crotch.

Doctor Who’s current executive producer say's “It’s still unearthly now. It’s a collection of sounds that you simply cannot imagine coming from the real world. We’ve heard all sorts of weird sounds since,I can’t imagine what people made of it.”

Several candidates are currently being considered, while rumours abound, that Billie Piper may get her job back, with producers citing her real-life role as eliminating the traditional role of teenagers, being the dirty old man's village bike, to prove that Dr Who has surrendered his teenage fantasy for a mature woman with full breasts. 

We caught up with the latest experimental sanitized BBC Dr in the form of the metrosexual Dr Beckham at his residence during a break in shooting, and were ushered grovelling into his exalted presence. He was languishing on his chaise-longue, clearly exhausted after his latest Bacchanalian orgy, and his toga was strategically parted to enable kneeling football hobbit Joe Cole to administer enthusiastic and skilful fellatio.



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