Brian Clarke | JournalistDirectory

Brian Clarke | JournalistDirectory
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Saturday, January 19, 2008

Dara O'Briain - "Listen"




Dara (at the Theatre Royale) gives relationship advice to a couple in the audience





The Gathering - Toss The Feathers







Brian Boru



brian boru is an old march composed by O'Carolan the blind Harpist, something around the 16th or 17 century, its about Brian Boru the last High King of Ireland, killed at the battle of Clontarf 1014, when Ireland defeated the Vikings and cleared the country of invading barbarians until the brits came a few hundred years later.



Maraiodh Brian Boru chun beatha na heireann
Siochain in gcuige Uladh agus i mbaile 'cliath
Aontacht an teaghlaigh, aontacht na dtuath
Aontacht an domhain is na gCeiltteach





Thursday, January 17, 2008

Irishman cuts off his own arm to escape British TV nightmare




D'Unbelievables are an Irish comic duo formed in late 80s by Pat Shortt and Jon Kenny in Limerick. They created characters which can be seen on every street corner and every pub in Ireland.
Their performances include; One Hell of a Video, D'Telly, D'unbelievables, D'Video,D'Collection, Films: The Closer You Get, Angela Mooney Dies Again, Saltwater, This Is My Father.

After days trapped on the sofa of his home, Patrick Murphy realised that he must sacrifice his own arm — or go insane

Speaking from his hospital bed, Mr Murphy recalled the story of horror beyond human understanding: "It began when the remote fell down the back of the big sofa bed," stuttered a one armed Mr.Murphy. "I put my hand down to retrieve it and my arm stuck in the folding mechanism. After hours of trying to free myself, It was clear that it wasn't going to work itself loose. I had to sit and wait for help to arrive."

But no one came for Mr Murphy. After two days, still no knock on the door, desperation set in. "I ran out of potato crisps after two days, and the last of the Guinness went shortly after that. And all the while the British Broadcasting Corporation kept broadcasting endless footage of socially and mentally inadequate ex-celebrities playing with themselves, with these horrible accents, in the jungle somewhere," said Mr Murphy. "After a while, the bullshit of it all began to play on my mind. I started to hallucinate. Ridiculous visions of top-quality Irish television drama danced before my eyes. Only then did I make the decision to cut off my own arm with the ring-pull from a Guinness can."

As anyone who has ever cut off their own arm can tell you, this is no easy matter, he said. Mr Murphy has cut off his arm, so he recounts the story: "At first I couldn't cut the flesh covering my arm. In fact, I needed to make it numb to stand any chance, so I clubbed my arm with a magazine until it went limp. After that, it was a simple matter of cutting through the flesh and muscles until I was free."

Finding his way to the telephone with his bleeding arm in tow, Mr Murphy dialled the ambulance and slumped on the floor. "They told me they'd definitely be round before the end of the week," recalls Murphy, "so I kept up morale by switching manually to RTE the Irish channel. I thought there'd be some documentary strand worth watching, instead of all that BBC endless loop of celebrities pulling off their faces to advertise some BBC channel package. It just went on, and on, and on...."

At this point in his sad story Mr Murphy broke down. Doctors asked the hacks and paparazzi to let the poor man get some rest. The assembled press respected his wish but not before one last question: "What was the worst moment?" A sobbing Murphy did not hesitate in his reply: "John Simpson's pompous and self-satisfied face twittering on for the 200th time about 'Freeview — or some new package of BBC channels...'."

Mr Murphy is expected to make a physical recovery. His long-term mental well-being depends largely on some decent TV schedules.





Wednesday, January 16, 2008

The Court-martial of Countess Markievicz







Men Behind The Wire - Barleycorn



The Men Behind The Wire

lyrics:

Armoured cars and tanks and guns
Came to take away our sons
But every man must stand behind
The men behind the wire
Armoured cars and tanks and guns
Came to take away our sons
But every man must stand behind
The men behind the wire

In the little streets of Belfast
In the dark of early morn
British soldiers came arunning
Breaking little homes with scorn
Hear the sobs of crying children
Dragging fathers from their beds
Watch the scene as helpless mothers
Watch the blood fall from their heads

Armoured cars and tanks and guns
Came to take away our sons
But every man must stand behind
The men behind the wire
Armoured cars and tanks and guns
Came to take away our sons
But every man must stand behind
The men behind the wire

Not for them a judge or jury
Or indeed a crime at all
Being Irish means they're guilty
So they're guilty one and all
'Round the world the truth will echo
Cromwell's men are here again
England's name again is sullied
In the eyes of honest men

Armoured cars and tanks and guns
Came to take away our sons
But every man must stand behind
The men behind the wire
Armoured cars and tanks and guns
Came to take away our sons
But every man must stand behind
The men behind the wire

Proudly march behind our banner
Proudly march behind our men
We will have them free to help us
Build a nation once again
On the people, step together
Proudly marching on our way
Never fear or never falter
Till the boys come home to stay

Armoured cars and tanks and guns
Came to take away our sons
But every man must stand behind
The men behind the wire
Armoured cars and tanks and guns
Came to take away our sons
But every man must stand behind
The men behind the wire





Luke Kelly Joe Hill



Joe Hill


I dreamed I saw Joe Hill last night,
Alive as you and me.
Says I "But Joe, you're ten years dead"
"I never died" said he,
"I never died" said he.

"In Salt Lake, Joe," says I to him,
him standing by my bed,
"They framed you on a murder charge,"
Says Joe, "But I ain't dead,"
Says Joe, "But I ain't dead."

"The Copper Bosses killed you Joe,
they shot you Joe" says I.
"Takes more than guns to kill a man"
Says Joe "I didn't die"
Says Joe "I didn't die"

And standing there as big as life
and smiling with his eyes.
Says Joe "What they can never kill
went on to organize,
went on to organize"

From San Diego up to Maine,
in every mine and mill,
where working-men defend their rights,
it's there you find Joe Hill,
it's there you find Joe Hill!

I dreamed I saw Joe Hill last night,
alive as you and me.
Says I "But Joe, you're ten years dead"
"I never died" said he,
"I never died" said he.

http://www.tomdispatch.com/post/174881/rebecca_solnit_journey_into_the_heart_of_an_insurgency






Tommy Tiernan - Drug Olympics







Mary Coughlan Band - Ain't nobody's business




This clip was recorded live on an afternoon show "Performers" with Siobhán Cleary as the host - Martin McElroy - Drums, Conor Barry - Guitar, Ritchie Buckley - Sax, Dave Murphy - Keyboards, Ger Kavanagh - Bass




Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Rocks of Bawn Live and unplugged




Knob-Chop Doc anti-Semite say Militant Beardies


Irish surgeon faces Guantonemo internment camp.

The Irish surgeon who cut off the penis of a man who was only booked in for circumcision is an anti-Semite, the US Jewish lobby has declared.

Dr Patrick Murphy has been arrested over accusations of negligence, malpractice and failure to possess the necessary certification for knob and rock surgery, although the bearded black helicopter brigade says the conspiracy goes far deeper than that.

"This man is an anti-Semite," stated one. "Why else would he cut off the penis of an innocent man? We may have another Joseph Mengele on our hands — who knows how many he has already prevented from procreating. He must be held in a containment facility and if necessary executed."

Despite the patient's confessed Catholicism, the event has sent a chill through America. "There is an increasing incidence of this anti-Semitic behaviour," one congressman told reporters. "This is a free and fair country and anyone that doesn't respect different races and religions can leave. Especially Muslims."

Under new laws, the US government is entitled to imprison indefinitely anyone in the world that behaves differently to how it wants them to. Already, a Chilean farmer, a sports commentator from Zambia, some rag-heads and several thousand Afghans have been subject to the laws which will protect our freedom. Dr. Murphy is most likely to be transported to a new facility being built in Texas, rather than Guantonemo, for those of alternative ideological persuasion.

Meanwhile, the memberless patient, who begged us to remain anonymous, continues to rock back and forth in front of a selection of pornography, desperately going through his kitchen cabinets every five minutes in the hope of finding something that will relieve him. The closest so far was the lemon zester.

Dr. Murphy in his defence has stated, that if something can go wrong , it will go wrong, according to Murphy's Law which is not his fault and that the partient is lucky to have his rocks on, atall atall, as he understood the man wanted a sex change.





Monday, January 14, 2008

An Sorcas Beag - Galway



It'll be a trip 100 youth from 12 different countries. We will refilm tomorrow and replace the preview so watch out for the final version.





Sunday, January 13, 2008

Phil Coulter - The Man from God Knows Where



United Irishman Thomas Russell (The man from God knows where). 'An if he didn't speak well none of us spoke, and we sat till the fire burned low'. I always wondered where my 'oul lad got this saying from.

The second song is about Henry Joy McCracken, the leader of the United Irishmen in Antrim in the Rebellion of 1798. McCracken was a presbyterian and he was captured and then hanged for his role in the rebellion in the north.






Kathleen Largey







Maimin Cajun Band, An Dreoilin



The Maimin Cajun Band from Conamara, fronted by Sean Monaghan sings An Dreoilin, accompanied by zany slides of Ireland... There are 2 other versions of this very popular song on TG4gaeilge, with Sean himself in the video (although the sound track is best on this version). The song concerns a wren, the king of all birds, and a frequent topic in Irish folklore. This wren has some troubles with a cat.