Sunday, 14 December 2014

SPONGERS DEATH OF A THOUSAND CUTS




Urban Dictionary: Sponger

spongers
freeloader
parasite
sponge
sponging
chav
dole
moocher
bodyboarder
bum
leech
bloodsucker
bodyboard
borrower
deadbeat
loafer
scrounger
scum
stretch
government cheese

A person who repeatedly borrows things. Often a person who also doesnt return them and adopts the attitude that you exist solely as a free equipment supply warehouse.

This stems from an underlying attitude problem where the person believes they will get away with whatever they can, to get through life.

This is not to be confused with genuine forgetfulness, where a person will feel openly guilty when borrowing from you and will buy their own gear immediately afterwards.

This person comes under the category as a pseudofriend

Possible solutions include openly embarrasing the person infront of others, or lend them broken gear. Embarrasment doesnt always work as they have no pride in themselves, and they will always return something that's broken as they will have no use for it.
What a bloody sponger?! Every day he asks to borrow something and I never get it back.

Sod off! I'm not a walking stationery shop you sponger!

sponger

Due to genetic inadequacy, was never able to grow large enough balls to become a full fledged entity..


We are just receiving reports from British Occupied Ireland, that an Orangeman in Omagh called Sammy or Seany or something like that, committed suicide last night, after British Prime Minister David Cameron left Belfast and called the Orange Order representatives a bunch of spongers and that he was putting their Protestant Parliament for a Proetestant people into administration. Apparently the Orangeman strangled himself, after he was heard screaming, first Rangers, now Stormont, both in administration, where's my welfare state..... I'e had enough, I'm not hanging around, for the death of a thousand Tory cuts.

Apparently the Orangemen upset Cameron, when they demanded that the10 billion pound sterling annual subsidy by British txpayers to the their Ornage state, be increased to 12 billion annually. Cameron told them, that after the next election, he plans 30 billion pound cuts in public spending, starting with Occupied Ireland, where he plans to eliminate their subsidy altogether. There was so much weeping and gnashing of teeth, among the God fearing Orangemen, that Gerry Adams asked them to join him in a decade of the Rosary. Well desperate times require desperate measures and the Ornagemen rpeated after Gerry, the Hail Holy Queen to the following words 
Hail, holy Queen, Mother of Mercy,
Hail our life, our sweetness and our hope.To thee do we cry, Poor banished children of Cameron; To thee do we send forth our sighs,
Mourning and weeping in this Irish valley of tears.Turn then, most gracious Mary ,Thine eyes of mercy toward us; And after this our exile, Show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb, a united Ireland, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary. Pray for us O holy Mother of God, that we may be made worthy of the promises of Eire Nua. After which all the sinners in Stormont repented with sackcloth and ashes.

So when Seany or Sammy or whatever you want call him, a life long supporter of Rangers football club, who are already in Administration, heard this news, he simply couln't handle the loss of his beloved welfare state and strangled himself, while his friend an avid fan of the Kop who are also on a downward spiral, went out and got pissed. If you want anymore eatails about the Eire Nua document, you can go to the group Federal Democratic Socialist Republic on facebook and ask one of the admins for the document. Oh yes, almost forgot if you see Sinead O'Connor, tellher to have a read of it. It's the genune Irish republican blueprint.
Slan go Fomghaill !
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